Pride From Within

A friend and I were talking about our children over a glass of wine a month or so ago. We were discussing the different struggles we've had since becoming mothers and how our theory of deliberately parenting for the long-term is much more difficult than simply being a parent each day. I mentioned an article I read that struck a chord with me when my son was potty training. The author prescribed telling your child "You should be proud of yourself" instead of "I'm proud of you."

It may not seem like a profound difference at first glance, but I believe there is a significant life lesson for children (and ourselves) when the focus is on pride from within, from one's own accomplishments.

Thinking long-term, a child who is looking for others to be proud of him/her is dangerous. All you have to do is think about the peer pressure waiting for your child when they attend school. Don't you want to instill confidence beginning today?

I took the advice from the article and put it to use months ago. And when my son called his grandparents and said in an excited voice, "Guess what Nana, I'm potty trained. I'm so proud of myself!" I have to be honest, I was proud of him...and proud of myself for passing along a lesson I hope will be with him all of his life.